So I often come across blog posts that talk about the many woes of parenthood. Many include such things as waking up all hours every single night, never being able to use the bathroom alone, having no sex life, wrecked house at all times, grocery store chaos, etc. You know the type of blogs I’m talking about. The type that tells us that we have to give up on ourselves and our dignity.
But we have four kids. And we just don’t agree. Now we have lived in “the trenches.” We spent many years there. Thank goodness, we aren’t anymore. But even when we were, I never had a kid in the bathroom with me while I went poop. Just. Never. Maybe *maybe* when they were infants, but I’ve never understood the kids in the bathroom thing. Nobody watches me poop. Nope. I don’t care who you are.
And while our house can be a serious wreck at times, it’s not always. It comes and goes. My kids clean up after themselves. Laundry is manageable. And kids don’t have to eat and drink all over the house. When my house is a mess, it’s because I’m not using my time wisely. It’s because I’m being lazy. And believe me, I do have many lazy days.
They really don’t have to control every aspect our our lives. We don’t have to allow them that kind of control. We really don’t. We are, after all, the grown ups. So when I read over and over again about parents not having had sex in weeks/months because their kids won’t let them, I’m just like, “WHAT!?” Can’t relate, folks. I just can’t.
You let them climb on the kitchen counters? Yeah sorry, can’t relate.
And I seriously dislike parent shaming. That’s not what I’m trying to do. We all do our best. I believe that. My best is so extremely far from perfect, it’s not even funny. But maybe we should try to remember that we are the parents. They are the children. And we let them live in our houses.
I should add, however, that I’m pretty sure our four year old has flushed hair bows down the toilet and seriously stopped it up twice in the last week. That one might be using the bathroom outside for a while.